afterTHOT: I Forgot My Jockstrap

So I’m finally conquering my feels and getting around to writing my first afterTHOT post. As I mentioned previously, these will be smaller posts about my experiences within the dating realm.

The first THOT Ima talk about is myself.  Early in mine and The Scientist’s “relationship,” I spent a glorious night at his place and the next day I actually got ready for work at his apartment.  So I jumped in the shower and he gave me a toothbrush.  A toothbrush, ya’ll!  That I left at his place!  This meant he wanted me to come back more often, right?!  So I’m totally not ashamed to wear the same pair of underwear two days in a row, but he was like, no borrow mine.  I’ll admit that weirded me out a bit, but it also kinda turned me on!  How could I resist borrowing a clean pair of undies from the cutest boy ever!  Well, in the midst of packing up my stuff and getting ready, I forgot my blue jockstrap (one of my fave pairs of undies) on his living room floor where I’d tossed them the night before in a throe of passion.

Later that day The Scientist’s Judies (as he refers to his friends like an old queen) came over and were chatting on his couch when he noticed my jockstrap on his shag rug.  He quickly hid it under the couch with a sweep of his foot.  And he almost got away with it too until one of his friends decided to lounge on the floor and happened to peak under the couch and recognize a pair of underwear that was not his style!  Of course they gave him a hard time for letting a trollop he barely knew walk out in his underwear.  But that’s the life of someone Independent Single and Free!

The Scientryst Pt. 1: The Intro

I started writing about The Scientist a few months back, but as I mentioned in my last post, I’ve been too much in my feels to finish.  I was going to ask for advice from you about this boy, but that time has passed.  Now allow me to just reflect upon the situation in 4 parts…

I met The Scientist online back in November while I was at the ribbon cutting ceremony for the new streetscape on Argyle Street.  I’d mentioned that I had just had lunch and suggestively said that I was looking for dessert, which apparently made hibeakerm chuckle while he was grocery shopping.  So I stopped by when he got home and we instantly connected.  He was so sexy with his long, beautiful, kempt dreadlocks that felt so amazing as they’d fall all over my naked body.  I would soon find out that he was classy, and stylish. And smart!  I mean, he grows alternative fuels and shit from fungus or something!  Like wow!  He was worldly and traveled.  He was sex positive yet modest which was an adorable juxtaposition.  He was so sweet and cute.  And those lips, though!

As the weeks went on everything was perfect.  We were secret lovers.  No one knew about our tryst until a few weeks had passed.  Then we still didn’t connect on social media nor did we meet each other’s friends.  But it wasn’t like a dirty little secret, it was a sexy little secret that only we shared.  He was giving me everything I’d wanted for years!  He’d run his fingers through my hair, which The Ex never did over the 12 years we were together.  We’d cuddle in our underwear as we’d Netflix & Chill.  He loved period shows and documentaries!  How cultured and intelligent!  We were instantly so intimate and connected that we didn’t even have to have sex every time I was over there.  I even started staying the night 2-3 times a week!  And I was totally upfront about living with The Ex and how I wasn’t looking for anything serious, though I could’ve easily fallen for him (that part I kept to myself until a few months had passed).  He said he wasn’t looking for anything in particular either.  We were just having fun and living in the moment.  It was my first time really living in the moment in a long time.

We exchanged numbers, and we texted everyday!  Though, in retrospect, I was usually the one to initiate conversation.  And I always responded way too quickly every time, so I needed to play it cool and I joked that from now on I’d have to wait an hour before responding.  He taught me how to use the energy saver on my iPhone.  He taught me that the PH levels in our bodies are always changing which could explain my recent dandruff that I’d NEVER had before.  He always said I was extra and dramatic, to which I responded that I preferred the term “histrionic”!  He also called me a hoe because I was open about my sex life (though I was quickly considering giving up all my lovers, even though I knew I couldn’t commit at the moment).  I know he was only joking, but I told him he needed to stop calling me a hoe, and we settled on a friendlier and yet still funny term “trollop”.

Things couldn’t have been more perfect.  Though, sometimes I wondered if I was staying over at his place because I liked him and wanted to, or because I was avoiding being home with The Ex.  I concluded that it was probably a little bit of both, but I definitely liked him!

Stay tuned next week to learn how the relationship (I use that term by its literal definition) progressed.